Day twenty-five - for others

One of my all time favorite things; gift giving! I am not a huge fan of getting gifts; I never know what to ask for, which means I get asked about 100 what I want, and then everyone is irritated because I usually go buy what I want the week before Christmas, birthday, or etc.
I LOVE giving gifts! Over lunch today I went to the store to kill time. I had to get new work cloths when I started my new job and I had store cash that I needed to spend. So I went and bought cloths for Kenzie, Ali, and Tiff. Now, when I had to go buy work cloths I hated it!! But today I got to go shopping for my family, and I loved every minute of it! It makes me so happy to come home and have the girls get so excited (yes I am that dad)!!!!
I do love days like this!

Day Twenty-four - sometimes just an ear to bend

Sometimes things are just crap......... Not a lot can be changed, some things are just out of your control, and you really wish the day would end at about 9:00 am. Today was one of those days. Some days it just seems that nothing can go right, but sometimes the only good thing is that someone is there to hear about it.
Crap happens...... But that is why we have moms!
Sometimes things can not be fixed and sometimes you try your best to roll with the punches but that logic sometimes begins to fades. Don't get me wrong, my wife is there for me through everything but sometimes that 3 year old in you just wants to call out for you Mommy :)
The great part about this logic when you get older though is, you get the chance to be there for your parents too! But in this situation I have to say, today was a strictly silver lining day; the day sucked, but at least my mom was there to just listen and help realize the bigger picture!
Thanks Mom!!!

Day twenty-three - so here it is

Another sick day, on a Monday......... Not a good start to the week. I do not have  a lot that is great on a day like today, but through all the crap there is still my wife. She is there for me and has been for a very long time. There is a THOUSAND things I could say but I can sum it up within one poem (thank you E.E. Cummings)

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in

my heart)i am never without it(anywhere

i go you go,my dear;and whatever is done

by only me is your doing,my darling)

                                                      i fear

no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want

no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)

and it’s you are whatever a moon has always meant

and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows

(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud

and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows

higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)

and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)

I love you!

Day twenty-two - my baby girls 4th birthday party

So today was crazy but a good day overall! Four year old birthday parties are NUTS but behind all the crazy is the act that my daughter has gotten old enough to have a "big girl"  birthday party.
This was not a party for the family and the adults this time. She had 10 little friends over and they played like crazy people for over 2 hours. It looked like something exploded in our house, something filled with everything pink exploded!
Now that is not the good, the good is that my daughter is four and having her first big girl birthday party. In a world where there is so much bad in the world, every year is a blessing. That is true for little girls as well as for us adults. Each year, or month, or day that goes by that we are all still together is a blessing. So to share a day like this is just a better day than usual, but every day should be seen in the same light, blissful!

Day twenty-one - A dad and his babies

So the downside for the day - my wife had to spend the entire day at a conference.
The upside of the day - me and my girls got to spend the entire day together, just us!
Me and do not ge many days to spend as just the three of us. Now do not get me wrong, I love the weekends that we all spend together, but it is nice to spend some time as just the three of us. The dynamic changes when it is just us. They spend all day, every day with her so they have a tendency to see her more as a "get me this", "I want this", "I need this"! Not to say they do not do that to me too but it is just a little different when it is just us.
We started the day off with toast and 3 hours of top twenty on CMT. We played it loud, we sang, and we danced (really bad I might add) through the whole thing. While Ali took her nap Kenzie and I played memory ........ F-o-r-e-v-e-r! We also watch a movie. Kenzie was surprised that I found a movie for the both of us, a non-dead movie ( her words)   :) when Ali got up we dinked around a little more.
I love my time with my little girls, it reminds me of how much I LOVE being a dad!

Day twenty - Friday!!!!

Easy one today. FRIDAY!!!!!!
It is one of those things, that no matter how crappy a day is, the fact that it is Friday makes all the problems seem so small! So here is how it went:
I went back to work after 2 days of being sick so getting back in the grove makes the morning tough
I did not really get anywhere throughout the day with any of my clients
They wanted me to make up all the work that I missed (aka 3 new clients in one day)
Money problems, money problems, money problems, and on, and on.........
The girls were both in crappy moods
And these are the highlights

Now I know this is not sounding like I am looking for the good in the day, but no matter if I added 30 more things to this list they all just fade away. It was Friday, one of the best days of the week! The weekend is great but Friday, Friday is the best. You had to work but when 5:00 rolls around that means we are just a the VERY start of the weekend, we have the whole night to look forward to our 2 days off!!! Saturday is full of task that have been put off for the week, and Sunday you spend have the day just thinking that Monday is coming ( but way excited that The Walking Dead is on at night ).   But Friday, Friday is to adults as Christmas morning is to kids. We are excited to see what is in store for us, we can not wait too do all the things that we knew were coming, and we love the fact that, even if it was not expected, it is usually a good!
Ya for the day of Friday!!!

Day nineteen - family

So not as late as the last but still late. This one is going to be another important one but short too, it is pretty self explanatory. My family is awesome! :)
So here is the run down:
My baby sister, Kaity - My sister is one of the craziest little person I know! She likes to listen to classical music as well as CD's all about moose! My baby sister I is now nine, so not much of baby anymore, but she will be the baby for ever.
My older baby sister, Annagrace - I have never known an older child in my life. My sisters were born when I was 16 and 18 years old, respectfully. So really both of my sisters are my baby sisters, but they are really two different people. Anna has seemed like she was a wise woman behind those big blue eyes since about two- years-old. Sometimes, when she talks, she seems like she is the oldest! She is now 12 years old, and LIKE REALLY becoming a teenager, but she is still one of the most amazing people I know!
My baby brother, Mitch - so DEFINITELY not a baby! 19, and his first year in college, not a baby. But he is the youngest of us 4 boys so he fits the bill of the baby brother. I have a problem with babying my younger siblings and that does not help when I am the oldest! He is the coolest little brother I have known.
One of the middle guys, Seth - Seth, Anna, and I all have the same problem, we are too much alike! Anna and I are far enough apart that it seems cute, Seth and I are just enough apart but close enough together that he seemed to always coming into a certain phase as i was coming out of it. Growing up it always seemed to be difficult. Now I do have to commend him, he is one of the bravest person I know. I believe he has lived in about roughly 13 states in 4 - 5 years now, Hawaii being the most difficult to get too. He did door to door sales for a lot of that time as well. He has done some of the bravest things I have seen, things I would never dream of doing.
Before there was three there was two, me and Zach - so Zach does not come without his bravery as well. Zach has been married, bought a house, adopted his wife's daughter, and now they are pregnant with their second. Like I said, bravery! Zach is the next one down after me and we were  very much partners in crime. I take that back, a little, when Zach and I were not partners in crime then Seth and Zach were. But when it comes to Zach, I can not but feeling like a proud big brother every time he does something. I hope he never looks at it like I am patronizing him, but I can't help but feel like a proud person with every new step he takes. I can not help it, he is my baby brother ;)
And my only oldest sibling, my sister- in-law V (she also goes by Veronica) - so I have the best sister-in-law ever! When I met her I knew we were going to be be friends, but more importantly I knew she was going to be the one for my brother! She is amazing and one of the strongest people I have ever known. I am so happy that my brother found someone so amazing and I am glad that I can call her part of the family!
My mom, Kandes - this is the strongest woman I have ever met! My mom raised four boys by herself for years then married the best man I can now call Dad. My mom is one of those people that you don't know how people get through the hard things in life and yet you see her hold her head up high and knock down one thing that comes her way after another. The thing that is great about growing up is that, if you have the most awesome parents like I do, your parents go from being just your parents to being some of the best friends you can have.
M dad, Dean - so, yes he is my step-father, but he is the greatest Dad around. Don't get me wrong we started off a little rocky. I was a 14 year old boy and my mom was getting remarried. Needless to say I was a little on the attitude side. We did start off on a rocky point but I can gladly say that Dad is one of my best friends! H is the most up front and caring people I have ever met. When my parents divorced at 10, I thought everything was over. When I look back it was one of the best thing that ever happened, without it I would have never been able to have a dad that cares about me, my mom, and my siblings the way that Dean does.
So not so short but very important! I love them and I love how they care about me and my family.

Day eighteen - hard to find but it is there

Now I am way late, I need to make sure this does not become a habit! I have a good reason; a) I was sick all day and b) it is hard to find any good in a day when you feel that crappy! Regardless of that, there is good in every day, I need to be looking at that. The good of the day: it was extremely considerate of my boss to care about how I felt and to not make it into a big thing that I had to be gone for the day.
I know, it is a little crazy that I see that as such a positive, but it something I have not seen for a long time. To be treated with respect and dignity goes a long way. I have been pretty sick for awhile now and stress is a large problem that causes it to be worse. It was very hard to deal with before since when I had to be gone due to my symptoms then, it just caused my stress to be worse, which then caused my symptoms to be worse. This was a vicious cycle for a long time. The stress came from the fact that when I returned to work, even though I was covered for the time gone, we had to have "a talk" about my absentness (made up word but I like it). I knew these conversations would happen and it would just make the issue worse.
To be somewhere that was concerned, wanted me to go home to get better, and then wanted to see if there is anything they could do when I returned was something I have not seen. This sickness has been a huge issue this year, it has not been an easy thing to deal with. Between the sickness itself on me, but the toll it has taken on my family, and on top of that the medical bills that it has racked up has caused it to seem a little overwhelming. To be sick again now, when I just started a new job, I was terrified! To be treated with this much respect was a huge weight lifted off of my shoulders! I felt, for the past year with this problem, I thought I was going to be dealing with what I had been dealing with for the rest of my life. I am so happy that I was able to find out that not everyone treats people the way that I had been treated, people out there can and will be respectful and caring about what you are having to go through. That is my silver lining on a really crappy day (it is a pretty amazing silver lining though)!

Day seventeen - it was not all bad

I have said in the past that I started a new job a few weeks ago. There were some really crappy things that happened over this year. I know I focused a lot on those really crappy things that have happened this year too. With my medical condition my negative thinking made just made it worse. Accusations and betrayals made it seem like it was all for not. I had worked hard, put in a lot of hours, and sacrificed a lot of time with my family and it all fell apart in 6 months, it was really hard not to look at it like my sacrifices we for nothing.
A really good friend made me think of what that seven years really meant. That seven years first meant met my best friend. Without that job I would have never met her and in turn never met the whole group we hang out with. The years we worked together, the Saturdays that were MISERABLE due to a GREAT Friday night, the fun I had since I was a morning person and she was not, and etc., and etc.. It was great that I found someone that I can get along with so well, even more so sine we were starting over in new town.
I learned a lot over those seven years. I was 20 when I started and was just a kid, I was taught well by some of the greatest co workers that I had. Not only did I learn a lot from those that I worked along side with but also those that I worked with that reported to me. The biggest thing of all is teamwork. Some of those people I worked with have really made me see how much I enjoy the work with others, they have my back and I had theirs. I loved it.
I also loved that some of those that I worked with went from being co workers, to strong people that I respected, to amazing friends. Some did not end so great but some did not end, because these types of friendships don't ever end. I love that I found so many great people at one job. People that I could relate with, people I could get along with so well, people that I could call great friends, people I could SWOT with :) .
Though something ended bad it is not the exclamation point on the entire experience, it is just the end, that is all. There is a lot of great things that happened in seven years, and I thank all of those that helped make those seven years great!

Day sixteen - those that help others

So I do not have a long one for today, but it is short yet important.
I have started a new job just a few weeks ago. After working at the same place for seven years it is a little unnerving to start again.
It has been a huge help that, even in a commission based world, there is co-worker that is coming in early to have a class for those of us that have just recently started. It is amazing that someone is willing to take time out of his day to teach those of us that are not as fluent in this new position.
Thank you to those that look out for others. You can never overlook someone like that!
Like I said, short but important!